My Broken Angel
by Daime Guiral
Summary: "Demon. Monster." Those words pierced through my heart sharply. It hurt me to see Alec like this, miserable because of me. I shattered him into pieces. I broke him. I destroyed the love he had for me. And now, I wanted him back. God knows how much I wanted to make it up to him. But how, how can I do it? How can I heal my broken angel?
1. Foreword

**MBA A/N:**

Hello everyone! As a reward for my comeback and for a brand new start, I decided to post **this another malec fanfic of mine!** Before we officially start the story, as usual I have to leave some author's foreword on **what you will expect** on this story.

This story will also be rated M like ITDD but for an entirely different reason. This story is full of **AGONY and PAIN **and will tackle very sensitive topics like trauma, PTSD, self-harm and among other various things I can't tell yet. You will know why this story is too painful eventually. I cannot tell yet since it will spoil the whole story. So if you are just looking for a cliche, malec fluffy moments, I recommend you not to read this one. One thing I can assure on this story is that it will be a **really painful one** and I don't want you cursing me and be frustrated with me that there were hardly fluffy malec moments in this story. I am not saying it won't have a fluffy moments, of course it will. But it will be on the later part, I guess. **I will break your heart first over and over again before you will get what you want *evil laugh*.** 70% of the story covered the theme agony/pain. But I promise in the end it will be worth it :) I planned this story to be a very painful yet beautiful one. And hopefully I will succeed haha! There will also be shadowhunter theme in this story but it is very minimal compared to ITDD. This is an AU/AH story.

**Don't forget to follow my social accounts as I will be posting teasers, spoilers and probably update schedule with my stories(links on my profile). I have no definite time frame but I will do alternate updates with this and ITDD story.  
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**Anyway, I hope that's all? So, are you ready to break your heart? Let the show begin!**

**Lovelots,**

**Daime Guiral**


	2. Prologue: Meeting my Demon

**A/N:**

**You can also visit my website daimeguiral** . weebly .com to see the illustrations per chapter.** I assure you the **illustrations were good! It also has illustrations for ITDD. Huge thanks to my friend Jeffrey for illustrating it**! Enjoy the update lovelies!**

**Lovelots,**

**Daime Guiral**

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><p><strong>My Broken Angel<strong>

**Prologue: Meeting my Demon**

He was woken by the warm light rays of the Sun washing across his face, caressing his skin. Magnus slowly opened up his eyes as his consciousness came in. He was greeted by the sight of a white ceiling and he felt a light weight leaning on his side, a hand resting in his chest. He titled his head to the side and stared at the young man who was sleeping soundly against him. Images of last night came through him and his hang over hit him. He moved his shoulders and rested his hand on his forehead in an attempt to ease the headache he felt, but to no avail. The man beside him began to stir and afterwards, he opened his eyes. When he saw Magnus a smile formed in his lips and he began rubbing his hands on Magnus' chest.

Magnus flinched at his actions and when he leaned up to kiss him he tilted his head to avoid his kiss. The man frowned and backed up against him.

"What's wrong? You enjoyed it last night. Hell that was even the best night I ever had in my life!" The man whined at him but it only made Magnus irritated. His tiny voice resounded in his head and it hurt like hell.

"Quit whining! You know this is just a one night stand. Now, leave!" He yelled at him that made the man to stare at him in shock. He quickly got his pants and shirt that he wore last night and putted it on. Before Magnus could utter another word he quickly slammed the door shut and stormed out of his loft.

Magnus sighed when an eerie silence emerged in the room. He was going through this same, endless cycle once again. He was a famous fashion designer now and had made his stardom in the line of fashion and clothing. That fame made him rich, made him slept with countless men and women in show business, both famous actor and actresses. In fact, the media was always fascinated about his sex life, of who will be his next victim. They were anticipating who will be his next fling. He had to admit, him being a bisexual and having countless dates and flings had helped his stardom to shine. But deep inside, he knew he _wasn't_ complete. He went to the mirror and stared at his reflection.

He was like a zombie. Living in this world alive and vigorous, but deep inside him he was long _dead_. The soulless, expressionless reflection of his eyes confirmed it. He knew he should endure this endless loneliness he felt. This was his atonement of the _greatest sin_ he committed 3 years ago.

He went to the kitchen and grabbed a tablet of Advil to ease the throbbing of his head. After a few minutes the medicine finally kicked in and he went back to his room to clean up the mess and took a shower.

After 30 minutes of showering he went to his closet and grabbed his perfect outfit for the day. He was wearing a purple V-neck shirt covered with a white vest. He folded the sleeves of his vest up to his elbows. He wore a black washed skinny jeans. He faced to the mirror once again and did his makeup. 30 minutes later his phone rang and he quickly pressed the answer button without glancing of who was the caller.

"You're reaching the High Warlock of Brooklyn. To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"Seriously, Mags. Do you really need to have a grand introduction over the phone?" Magnus' lips twitched in a smile at the familiar voice he heard from the other line. It was his best friend and his manager.

"You know me Rags. I need to please them with all of my charm or else they wouldn't be all over me."

Ragnor scoffed at him on the other line. "Huh! Always so boastful. Anyway, I wanted to tell you something, but I'm not sure of how you'll react with it." Magnus raised his eyebrows as his curiosity loomed in. He and Ragnor usually talked over everything. So he couldn't understand why Ragnor was being so caught up about this.

"Rags, whatever it is you need to tell me. You know I won't judge you, no matter how kinky it is. If you had sex with Raphael in the public, it's fine with me."

"I'm not! It's not— Oh fuck it!" Ragnor mumbled and Magnus knew that his best friend was blushing beet red because of embarrassment. Magnus chuckled as his teasing statement was confirmed with Ragnor's answer. Ragnor rarely stuttered and he only did it when Raphael made him do a kinky scene.

"Uhh. Anyway, this call isn't about me. It's all about you Magnus. I hope you'll be serious now."

"Okay, okay. What is it? Shoot."

The only replied he received from the other line was a heavy sigh, but then the next words Ragnor uttered made his whole world stop.

"He's back." Magnus' eyes widened and he felt his shoulders started to tremble.

"Ragnor, you mean-"Magnus forced himself for the words to come out but he ended up choking. He felt like his breathing was suddenly knocked out of him.

"Yes. Magnus, Alexander Lightwood is back. I saw him with Jace in the hallway. It seems Jace's manager decided to move him here."

"Alec- - my Alec!-"He repeated his name in his mind like a mantra. A swirl of emotions erupted in him as tears continuously fell from his eyes. Ragnor was the only one who _knew_ about the incident three years ago. He honestly thought Ragnor would abandon and disown him after hearing out his sin, but _no._ Ragnor helped him realized something and was helping him to make this right again.

But hearing his name again made his heart beat like _crazy_. He felt his body was on _fire_ and was _revitalized_ with so much energy. Only Alec could _do_ these things to him. Only Alec could make him _feel alive_ in this world.

"Where is he? Is he still in the entertainment building?"

"Yes, but you must know—"He didn't hear what Ragnor was saying anymore as he ended the call and stormed out of his loft. He quickly started the engine of his car breaking the speed limits to rush into the building. Fortunately, his apartment was near to the building so he was able to come in less than an hour.

"Where is Jace Herondale located?" Magnus quickly asked in the receptionist' area. He was gasping for breath as he tried to calm his breath.

"He's in the third floor sir, in the—"The moment the receptionist told their location he quickly went to the stairs and rushed through the third floor. He didn't bother going to the elevator knowing there were people waiting for it and that would delay his time on meeting his blue-eyed angel once again. By the time he reached the third floor he was panting and gasping for air but then his world stopped when he saw a glimpse of his blue eyed angel.

The hallway was filled with media and press while on the middle there stood Jace Herondale. The whole hallway was filled with screams and squeals and thousands of flashes of camera. He could tell that the interview was coming to end when the media slowly began to dissolve. When the media finally dispersed Alec called Jace and he turned to him. He was talking lightly to Jace, but what their topic all about, he didn't know at all. He could see his angel with his brilliant blue eyes that stood up against his pale skin. He was laughing timidly as blushes filled his face. He was so adorable that he couldn't help but love him. How long was he _longing_ for his brilliant face and angelic smile to see again? How long was he longing to _have_ his angel by his _side_? But when Alec suddenly lit up his head, his blue eyes locked with his golden green one.

And Magnus was hurt by the sudden change he witnessed across his angel's face. His blue eyes widened and the brilliance of his blue eyes was instantly gone. It transformed into dark blue that it was almost pitch black, he could see and feel the _turmoil_ building up inside him. He suddenly hugged himself and unconsciously scratched his shoulders so hard it drew blood. He was trembling like crazy.

Magnus' heart was stabbed by knives a million times as he saw his blue eyed angel trembling in fear. He was so defenseless, hopeless and fragile seeing him like this. And what made it worse was that he _knew_ exactly the reason why his angel was trembling in fear.

"Alec, Alec what's wrong? Are you having a panic attack again?" Jace said as he wrapped his arms around him in an attempt to comfort his best friend. Alec was still trembling in fear as he raised his fingers and pointed his direction. The next words his angel uttered _killed_ him.

"Plea—Please! Please take me aw—_away _from that mo-_**monster**_**!**" Jace looked up where his hand was pointing and a wave of rage flashed through him. He fisted his hands hard as he was fighting the urge to punch Magnus' face. He really wanted to punch the hell out of Magnus but he knew Alec being in calm was his _priority_. Alec needed _him_ now more than ever. He hugged and blocked Alec's sight from his tormentor. Because of fear Alec couldn't recognize anyone anymore, all he thought was he needed to find a way to get out of here. He was struggling against Jace's grip but he only held him tighter.

"Please! Please! I _don't_ want to face my own _**demon**_! Please!" Alec cried in agony as tears fell from his eyes. A minute later Alec passed out and collapsed on the floor.

"Alec, Alec!" Jace tried to wake him up but to no avail. He carried Alec in his shoulders and lifted him up in a bridal style. Just then, Jace's girlfriend, Clary came in and stared at them in shock.

"Jace! What happened to Alec!"

"That _**bastard**_ had the nerve to grace us with his _oh so lovely_ presence." Jace spat back as he glared at him. Magnus flinched at the words he uttered, and it hurt even more that Alec couldn't bear to be in the _same_ building with him to the point he _passed out_ of consciousness. Clary widened his eyes when he saw him.

"Let's go, we need to take care of Alec." He said as he took the step towards the elevator without looking back. Clary stood in his position for a while and looked at Magnus with sadness and apologetic look in his eyes before Jace called her again. This time, they went to the elevator and stared at one another before the elevator door closed. The last time he saw was the wrecked face of his angel.

Tears started to flow in his eyes and he felt as if his energy was suddenly drained from the commotion a while ago. He ended up kneeling in the floor as he punched it, and caused the blood to seep from his hands.

**"Fuck! This is your fault! Damn it! Damn! Damn! Damn!"** He muttered to himself as he continued punching the floor. The floor was filled with his blood just then Ragnor caught his hand and hugged him back.

"I was supposed to tell you not to meet him yet. He was obviously _devastated_ because of the incident Magnus." Ragnor said as he soothed his back. But Magnus' attention wasn't on him. Scenes from the past filled his mind, the memories he was trying to bury a long time ago.

_"I love you Magnus! You are my life! I praised you! And I will follow you wherever you will go! I will always be here for you!"_

_ "Don't cry Magnus. You know I'll always support you right?"_

_ "Even if the world was crashing down, I will never leave you."_

_ "I love you eternally, Magnus Bane."_

_Once upon a time, there was a blue-eyed angel who adored me. When the world was against me, he was the only one who stood with me. He loved me with all of his might. I was his life. He praised and supported me for my happiness, even if it means him being in endless pain and agony. He loved me so much that he will follow me even in the deepest pits of hell. _

_ But, I took him for granted. I left him hanging. I abandoned the love and adoration he had for me. I was too blind to see the reality that he was the only one I needed in this world. The only one who kept me sane. The only one I needed to be alive. Most of all, the only one I truly love._

_ But when I realized it, it was too late. Damn too late._

_ "Demon. Monster." Those words pierced through my heart sharply. It hurt me to see Alec like this, miserable because of me._

_ I shattered him into pieces. I broke him. I destroyed the love he had for me. And now, I wanted him back. God knows how much I wanted to make it up to him. _

_ But how, how can I do it?_

_ How can I heal my broken angel?_

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><p><strong>AN:**

**Did you like it? You can also follow my social accounts for teasers and update schedules of this story. You can check them out in my profile. **Another thing, anyone who knew how to write a fight scene here? I am looking for someone who can help me with writing the fight scene in ITDD. So if anyone is up for it please PM me. Badly needed, in return you will have an advance copy of chapter 3 and 4 of ITDD, or an advance chapter copy of MBA. Any of my malec fanfic you wanted to read in advance, I will give you an advance chapter copy of it. Thanks!**  
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**Lovelots,**

**Daime Guiral**


	3. Chapter 1: The Green Eyed Beauty

**A/N:**

Hey! Sorry for the delayed update. I was not feeling well so I wasn't able to proofread the chapter in my original schedule. Anyway, I just wanted to tell you that this story will have **2 parts.** The first part will take place **what happened 3 years ago**. Where it all began, how Magnus and Alec's story started until it **led to the horrible thing Magnus did to Alec.** The **second part** will take place **after the prologue**. In the present. So, enjoy the update lovelies!

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><p><strong>Part 1<strong>

**The Blue-Eyed Angel**

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><p><strong>Chapter 1<strong>

**The Green-Eyed Beauty**

** Dear Diary,**

It is the first day of my classes today. I am very excited to meet my old friends, and maybe, I could find new friends this year. I hope this new school year will be kind to me. But I guess the main reason why I am so excited this school year is because I will get to _see him_ again. This whole summer he was away on a vacation. I really hope he enjoyed his vacation. Scratch that, I _knew_ he enjoyed it too much. He always loved to be the center of attention, he loves parties and everyone just seemed to be mesmerized by him. But who wouldn't? Everybody definitely_ loves_ him. Even _me._

Sigh. Though I think it also means that with him having on vacation, meant that he also enjoyed dating with men and women. I couldn't help but feel jealous. But it's okay, he's my _secret_ crush. And I am just contented being that way. There was _no_ way he would ever be interested in me. As long as _he's happy_, I am happy too. So much for now, I will end my entry here. I will get back to you once again.

**Alec.**

Alec smiled as he putted down his pen and finished writing in his diary. He had fixed his bed and was excited for this day. He couldn't wait to see Magnus and talked with him. He had missed him too much. Although he also missed Clary and Simon's companion together with his best friend Jace. He stood up and went to the mirror beside his bathroom to stare at his reflection. He possessed a feminine figure, from his high cheekbones and adorable small face and a slender hips and waist. He sometimes wondered if his figure had something to do with his preference. Alec immediately blushed at his thought as he remembered what he had written in his diary earlier. Unfortunately, he also remembered his reason of going into the bathroom. He wanted to quickly finish preparing up to be able to go to school early.

With a sigh he immediately went to his bathroom and took a bath. It only took a few minutes for him to finish his bath. He stepped out of the bathroom, combed his hair and went to his little closet to grab whatever sweater and pants he could get and quickly putted it on. In less than 30 minutes he was done and he grabbed his bag to go downstairs. He found his mom preparing for their meal and his dad was busy fixing Max's things on his bag. Alec smiled tenderly at the picture of his family.

He was really blessed to have them as his family. Even though the Lightwoods are known for being rich and having a big name in the industry, his parents, Robert and Maryse always made sure to have a quality time for them. They were making sure they didn't miss any big events and occasions in their life. Alec walked towards the kitchen where his mother was busy preparing their breakfast meal.

"Good morning Mom." Alec greeted her mother as he hopped into the counter and leaned in to kiss on her cheek.

"Good morning sweetie! Can you check on Iz and tell her to go downstairs so that we could have our breakfast? I will be done in a minute."

"Sure thing mom-"Alec was suddenly interrupted when he heard a loud slam coming from upstairs. He tilted his head and looked at his sister who had emerged from the door and was walking towards them while smiling brilliantly. He was amazed just how stunning Izzy was. She was like a replica of their mother. She exudes the confidence and grace of a lovely girl, except that she didn't get the vibrant blue eyes of their mother. But she was still gorgeous as she was with her mystic, pitch black eyes.

"Good morning my dear brother! How are you on this fine- **WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU WEARING?"** Izzy shrieked as he took in Alec's appearance. All of the people inside the house was startled at the loudness in her voice and turned to look at her.

"Good gracious Isabelle Sophia! It's still very early in the morning, don't yell! You'll disturb our neighbors! And for the love of God stop cursing! _Language_ Isabelle!" Maryse hissed as she nearly dropped the plate of pancakes she was holding on her hand.

"Oh. I am so sorry mother, I promise it won't happen again." Izzy said as she gave her mother a cute, puffy eyes that she knew no could resist. Alec rolled his eyes in reply.

"Okay, fine. Just be sure it won't happen again, promise me, okay?"

"Yay! Yes mother! I promise!" Izzy said as she raised her right hand as if she were taking oath to her mother. Maryse nodded in reply.

"Okay, come and take your breakfast."

"Yes mom! But for now I need to talk to Alec, we'll be quick. I promise."

"Okay then. Be sure to make it quick because we will be eating our breakfast once I'm done preparing the table."

"We will mom!" Izzy replied as he quickly grabbed Alec's shoulders and yanked him away from the kitchen counter. Alec stumbled at her harsh actions and found himself being trapped between Izzy and the wall.

"What the hell are you wearing brother! You won't be able to _get_ Magnus' attention with that crap you're wearing!" Alec immediately blushed at what she said. Izzy was the only one who knew his situation and preference. And his huge _secret _crush of their close, childhood friend.

"Izzy! Can you shut your mouth! They might _hear_ you!" Alec hissed in reply as he was busy looking towards their mother's direction, silently freaking out that they might overheard their conversation. Izzy just rolled her eyes at Alec's hilarious reaction.

"Keep calm brother. I am sure they _didn't _hear us. Really, I don't know what's holding you back from saying it to them. It's not like they will disown you for your sexuality brother. Mom and Dad will definitely love and accept you no matter what. Hell, they even _welcomed_ Magnus with open arms and didn't give a damn of his sexuality."

"I – I know that Izzy, but I'm just waiting for the right time. I just need time and strength to do this." Alec lowered his head in embarrassment. He really sometimes get angry with himself because he couldn't bring out to the whole world who he was. He knew his parents would accept him no matter what. But _admitting_ it to them, it was _another_ story. He needed to gather courage and strength to be able to do it. Izzy's eyes softened as she saw the defeat look of his brother.

"Fine, I won't push you Alec. But I would like you to _know_ that we are always here for you okay?" Alec lifted his head and stared back at the genuine love reflected in Izzy's eyes. He smiled shyly at her in reply.

"Thank you."

"But seriously brother! You can't get Magnus' attention with that! We still have, like 45 minutes before the time so let me dress you! I promise I will make you hot and gorgeous that will make Magnus drool over you!" Alec's blush worsened at the statement of her sister. He was beyond embarrass at what she said and though the thought was really tempting, he _couldn't_ do it. He was too shy and he was always afraid it wouldn't end well. Plus, he knew Magnus would _never _look at him that way.

"No Izzy. I promise I'm fine like this. You don't need to bother, really. And - and besides, Magnus would never look at me like that . . . plus I'm comfortable in this getup. So-"

"Alec, Izzy. Come here, we're taking breakfast." Their mother's voice suddenly echoed around the room with a tone of finality. Izzy released a heavy sigh, knowing full well she wouldn't able to dress Alec today.

"Fine, you get away this time. But next time, you_ can't _escape me and I _will _dress you up myself!" Izzy grabbed his hand once again and dragged him towards the kitchen. They took their respective seats and ate their meal together.

When they were full they stood up and got their bags and walked outside to ride in their car. Robert got into the driver's seat and started the engine. Throughout their ride everyone was quiet as Izzy and Max were busy dealing with their phones and IPAD. It didn't take too long before they arrived at Alicante High. Alec and Izzy turned their heads to face Max and kissed him on his cheeks.

"Goodbye Max. Have a nice day on your first day in class." They said as they bid their goodbye to their younger brother. They got out of the car and walked towards the driver seat and stared on their father.

"Good luck in your first class kids, remember, always do your best in your classes and don't involve yourselves on fights okay?" Robert reminded them one last time as he handed them their allowance for the week.

"We will father." They both said and nodded at their father's reminder. Robert nodded and they bid goodbye as the engine started once again and the car went off. Alec and Izzy stood on the side and stared as they follow the path of their father's car. A few seconds later the first warning bell rang signaling that the students needed to get into their room before the second bell rings. Alec and Izzy then rushed and went into their own respective rooms.

When Alec entered the room he noticed that the room was a bit noisy because of his classmates who were chatting with each other over their vacation. Unfortunately for him he didn't have any old friend in this class. He was hoping he get to have Jace in this class but to no avail. He sighed and chose a seat in the back near the window and went there. Alec opened his notebook and continued to write in his diary while waiting for their teacher when he felt a light tap on his shoulder. He looked up and saw a beautiful dark-haired girl with a stunning green eyes that resembled Clary and was waving her hand to him.

"Hello! Is this seat already taken?" The girl asked as she pointed a table next to his.

"Uh. I don't think so." Alec said as he shrugged in reply. The girl smiled brightly as if the burden on her shoulders was being lifted.

"That's great! You wouldn't mind if I seat here right?"

"Uh, no I won't mind."

"Great!" The girl went to the table next to him and began putting her stuff. Alec resumed in writing when he felt a gaze on him once again.

"By the way, what is your name sweetie?" Alec nearly blushed at her endearment and replied.

"I'm Alec."

"Cool. I am Aline. Nice to meet you! I hope we can be friends!" This time though, Alec couldn't hide his blush and felt it spread on his cheeks. Aline's eyes widened as she witnessed the adorable scene before her.

"Awh aren't you cute you're blushing!" she said as she pinched his cheeks. Alec just smiled in reply while silently cursing his pale skin.

"But you know, I have a feeling that you're like _me_."

"Like you?"

"Yes, like me, that we are-" Aline was interrupted when their professor suddenly came. Alec's eyes suddenly lit up when he recognized it was Clary's mother. Mrs. Fray gave him a knowing look before she returned her attention into the class.

"Good morning class. I am Mrs. Fray. I hope to have a nice school year with you."

"Good morning Mrs. Fray." The whole class responded and Mrs. Fray started to check the attendance of her students. When she was finished checking their attendance, she closed her class record and faced them for her announcement.

"Okay class, since this is your first day, we won't have a discussion about art right away. Instead, we will have an activity that will let us connect with each other. I want to know what is the _thing_ that inspires you, motivates you, or the thing that brighten up your life. You have to draw about that thing and discuss it here in front of the class. In that way, we will get to know each other better. Understood?"

"Yes Mrs. Fray." The whole class said and they began to get their drawing book and started drawing. At the announcement of Mrs. Fray Alec's mind already chosen the best subject to draw today. Magnus' cat-like golden green eyes seemed to flash in his mind every now and then and he couldn't help but to _fall_ in such rare beauty. And so without realizing about it he began to _draw_ Magnus' figure.

He drew him as a man who had his body gently leaning on a Cherry Blossom tree. There were some leaves that were carried away by the gentle, chilly breeze of the wind. The background was like a calm before the storm. On the left side it was bright but then you could see that dark clouds are beginning to cover the whole brightness of the sky.

Magnus touched one leaf and was staring at the tree intently. The pain and longing reflected in his eyes. As if the he were _jealous_ that the tree has a lifespan, it will changed over the time while he remained the _same_, frozen. But of course, he purposely hid Magnus' face behind the falling leaves so that no one will recognize him. He was sure he will be put up in a very awkward situation if they realized he was having a crush on the Campus heartthrob.

Instead, Alec focused on highlighting the magical effects of his golden green eyes. The brightest part in his drawing was Magnus' eyes. One look of the portrait and you will be captivated by the golden-green eyed beauty. Finally he was done and was satisfied with his work.

After a few more minutes everyone was done and they all began explaining their artworks on the front. When it was Alec's time he immediately blushed and felt the urge for the ground to just devour him because of embarrassment. All of the eyes of his classmates were solely focused on his artwork. They were amazed of the masterpiece Alec produced and began throwing him bunch of questions before Alec could even start explaining his work.

"Class be quiet. I know that we're all fascinated by Alec's piece but we need to know the story behind it. You can ask questions to Alec later okay?" the whole class nodded and went quiet.

"Alec, you may start."

"Right." Alec said as he released a heavy sigh to calm his nerves.

"I chose to draw this one because, because I was just . . . attracted of the magical entity of his golden green eyes. The figure in here is a one of a kind person. I always see it as an immortal, beautiful creation. But his beauty was being misinterpreted by the people surrounding him. Hence, the division of the brightness and the darkness in the background. They cursed him for his unusual beauty and gave him the cruelty of life. He wanted to die and end his sufferings but then he found out that along with his unusual beauty is that he possessed an eternal life. And he was sad because he _couldn't_ do anything about it. He wanted his suffering to end but _unable_ to do so. And then he is here, wishing that he will be like the cherry blossom trees that they will changed and withered in time."

The whole class was covered with adorning silence that made Alec's skin prickled. The next thing he knew there were thunderous applause given to him and just time, the bell rang.

"That was really excellent Alec. And now since the time is up, we will continue this discussion tomorrow. Take your lunch and have a good day." Mrs. Fray said as she dismissed their class.

Alec quickly arranged his stuff and went to their usual spot in the cafeteria. The first thing he noticed was Izzy sitting on their table. She glanced up and waved her hand to Alec. He waved back and walked towards their table and sat beside her. They started talking how their first class was when they heard few footsteps approaching their way and Alec was suddenly wrapped in a pair of strong arms from behind followed by other arms hugging them.

"Guys! You're suffocating us!" Alec said while choking as he struggled against Jace's grip. Clary and Simon smiled and released them from their grip. Izzy glared at Simon because he got her hair slightly messed up because of the hug. But Jace ignored Alec's plea as he tightened his grip around Alec even more and was throwing him playful punches on his belly.

"I'm sorry Iz. But really, we just missed you guys. It's been three months since we last saw each other." Simon apologized to Izzy as he offered his comb to fix her hair. Clary followed him and they sat on the chairs opposite to them. Izzy smiled at the sincere apology of his friend and took the comb from him.

"Well, we missed you too guys! How was your summer vacation by the way?"

"Oh, it was really fun. Simon and I got to tour around Asia this time. And we met Simon's relatives from his mother's side. What about you and Alec?"

"Nothing. We just stayed here in New York all throughout the summer. But we did enjoyed my ballet session and Alec recently joined archery. I gotta say, I was surprised he has a _natural_ talent in archery. And I think, this time Alec will _steal _the glory from Jace." Izzy purposely raised her voice for Jace to hear what they were talking about. Jace finally stopped his playful attacks on Alec and stared at them. Without releasing Alec he quickly jumped and sat on the chair beside his best friend causing Alec to flinch from the impact of Jace's actions.

"What? Alec stealing _my_ glory? Oh please, we need some _miracle_ for that to happen. And Alec excelling in archery is just natural. As he is _my_ parabatai." All of them raised their eyebrows at him as if he already lost his mind.

"Parabatai? What the hell is that Jace? Wait, is that even a _word_?" Clary managed to ask him as they recovered from their initial shock. Jace just shrugged in reply, ignoring the shock looks they had on their face.

"Parabatai. Your better half. It was like your best friend, your side-kick, your partner."

"Man, we are all aware that Alec is your best friend, but is there really a _need_ to use a difficult word to define your friendship? Why don't you just say best friend? Like me and Clary." Simon scoffed as he replied on Jace's answer.

"No. We had a _special_ bond. Our brotherly bond is _unique_, and therefore, it has to stand _out_ from the rest of the world. Whether you like it or not, he is my parabatai. And as my parabatai it is Alec's duty to put up with me. I am the best in fencing, therefore he should be best in archery. We had each other's back. Of course, I am the _leader_ of the band." Alec rolled his eyes while everyone expressed their disapproval in Jace's statement. They were about to retaliate with a witty statement when someone suddenly interrupted them.

"I see you're _enjoying_ yourselves, youngsters." Alec's eyes widened when he suddenly recognized that smooth, silky voice he _knew_ everywhere he go. He immediately tilted his head and looked at the golden-green eyed beauty in front of him.

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><p><strong>AN:**

Obviously, Magnus will appear in the next chapter. Did you like it? Please do leave a review. Thank you for the recent follows, reviews and favs you made on this story. As with **ITDD update**, it will be u**pdated on weekends, Friday or Saturday (my time), probably.** I don't know since I still need to re-read it and edit the whole chapter and I am not feeling well. Until then!

**Lovelots,**

**Daime Guiral**


	4. Chapter 2: Taking the First Step

**A/N:**

**9 reviews, 5 favorites and 16 follows. Just WOW!** I was overwhelmed with your support on this story! It seems many readers are smitten on what was the horrible thing Magnus did to Alec huh? Well, we will get to find that out soon! And thank you for those expressing their thoughts that they couldn't wait for an update on this story!

And speaking on update, I am sorry it took me awhile to update since this week I was too caught up in writing the future chapters of this story and ITDD. I didn't have a time to beta my stories so I couldn't post an update yet. But yeah, here it is! I decided to beta this story first since it receive so many support when it is barely in chapter 1. So, enough for the rambling and enjoy the update lovelies!

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><p><strong>Chapter 2<strong>

**Taking the First Step**

He was wearing a purple V-neck shirt that showed his lean smooth chocolate skinned chest and a tight pants that showed his perfectly sexy hips and curves. His eyes were covered in purple ring of eyeliner that made his golden green cat-liked eyes stood out. He noticed Magnus had a piercing on his right ear and the other was on his tongue as Magnus occasionally flicked his tongue out. And dear God, he found it very _hot._

Izzy suddenly gave him a knowing stare that made Alec lowered his head immediately. Izzy grinned at his reaction and tilted her head to greet the awesome Magnus Bane.

"Magnus! It's really great meeting you again!" Izzy said as she quickly hugged him that followed by Clary and Simon as Magnus joined them in their table. Magnus sat on the other side beside Alec. He tilted his head and raised an eyebrow in Alec and Jace's direction. Alec could feel his heart was thumping loudly at how intense Magnus' gaze was. He just wished they _wouldn't_ noticed the loud beating of his heart.

"Well, hello there Goldilocks. Not even a greeting for the magnificent Magnus Bane?" Jace rolled his eyes in annoyance at his witty statement.

"Oh please Sparkles. _Nobody_ missed you so _don't _be so full of yourself." Magnus smirked at him in return. These two undeniably had a love-hate relationship. They loved each other because they have each other's back as well as the solid friendship their little group had but they also hated each other simply because they only wanted all the glory to themselves.

"Wouldn't bet on that. Don't you think so, Alexander?" Magnus said and held his shoulder as he glanced in his direction. The moment their eyes met Alec felt his cheeks burned with blush and his heart skipped another beat.

"Ahm-"

"Huh! You wish Sparkles! Alec is only loyal to _me,_ his one and only parabatai! So get your hands off my parabatai!" Jace said as he hugged Alec even more. Alec was suddenly embarrassed at the little fight of his two friends while Magnus had his head back and uttered a beautiful laughter that was like a melody in Alec's ears.

"Are you sure about that Goldilocks? Looks like Alexander was struggling against your grasp because he doesn't want to be trapped with you." Magnus smirked that made the whole group laughed while Jace scowled in reply. He finally released Alec and he was grateful that he could finally breathe again.

"Whatever Sparkles. Just shut up and let's eat our lunch!" Jace declared with finality. They just giggled and let it go for Jace's sake.

They began eating their lunch and chitchat about everything. They discussed about Clary and Simon's classes together, how Jace enjoyed his P.E class. How Izzy was elected as the class muse. Just then Izzy finally asked about Magnus' vacation.

"Oh, it was really good! We got to tour all around Europe. The Eiffel tower in France was really beautiful. We also get to tour around Florence, Italy, Spain and Germany. Not to mention the beautiful palaces in London where the royal family resides." All of them nodded their heads in amazement as they imagined these beautiful places as what they saw at Magnus' social account. Unfortunately they also knew about Magnus' new conquest while he was on a vacation.

"And that reminds me, who was that hot man you met while you're on vacation? "Magnus smirked at the memory of that guy he was with last summer vacation.

"Oh. That hottie was Woosley Scott. He had a dark raven black hair and a royal deep navy blue eyes. He was really playful and let's just say we hooked up. Plus we have a mind-blowing sex- "

"By the angel we _don't_ want to know about your sex life!" Jace protested as he groaned and shifted uncomfortably.

"My, my Blondie. Here I thought _you're_ the Sex God."

"Huh! I really _am_ the sex god!" Jace argued back. Izzy just rolled her eyes in annoyance and was about to reply when Alec suddenly spoke.

"Ahm, guys can we, uh, skip this topic? Because it's really sensitive and uhh-" Alec's face flushed with blush as he realized their attention was on him. Just then Izzy, Jace and Magnus realized they have their three blushing virgin friends in their table. And apparently, they weren't comfortable of where the conversation was going.

"Oops. I'm sorry guys. Though I would love to share _everything_ to all of you, at least not _yet_. So yeah to make the story short, we got hooked up. I thought it will be good but he was just a coward man, or gay. When I found it out I called it quits. He's not even _worth_ my spare time." Alec raised his eyebrow in confusion but kept his mouth shut. Fortunately Magnus already knew his silent query.

"Honestly guys, who _wanted _to have a relationship with closeted gay? One moment we were so happy with each other. And then when his parents found it out he abandoned and humiliated me. Plus he even accused me of staining him! That I forced my way with him! I was an abomination! The nerve of some trash! He disgusted me the most! Those who were not proud of themselves to begin with doesn't _deserved_ my attention. Their level was even lower than that of a criminal being caught in the act. "Alec was frozen in his spot the entire time he was listening in Magnus' story. What happened to him was really horrible. Magnus didn't deserved it. But it didn't mean it _wouldn't_ hurt less. To know that Magnus was disgusted with a closeted gay, like _him._

He quickly shook his head at his thought. This wasn't about _him_. It was _about _Magnus. He raised his head and gave Magnus a sympathetic look but Magnus shook his head and was having none of it.

"Oh please everyone don't give me that look. I _don't _need your pity. Heck, I don't even care of that pathetic asshole. For all we know it was_ his_ loss, not mine. I'm hot as fuck and it was the _biggest _mistake of his life when he turned his back on me." Magnus replied to them as he smirked and gave them a mocking look.

"But he possessed your favorite combination Magnus. For all we know you love that combination." Simon said as he remembered that Magnus was a sucker for Black-haired, blue-eyed beauty.

"Sheldon-"

"It's SIMON!-"

"I may be a sucker of black-haired, blue-eyed beauty-" Magnus continued as if Simon didn't interrupted him. Suddenly he glanced in Alec's direction. In a brief moment their eyes met once again and Magnus _winked_ on him causing the latter to blush furiously. Magnus then glanced back to Simon.

"But I am not that desperate to_ become_ their slave. I am the sex god, and I'm used to people _begging_ to me just to taste me in bed." Because of Magnus' statement the tension of the group disappeared and they rolled their eyes in his arrogant, boastful attitude. Of course, it was Jace who strongly opposed of what he said.

"The _nerve_ Sparkle! You will never be a sex god because you're a cock sucker! You wanted to be taken instead of taking in charge of the bed! A true sex god _always_ take control in bed." Jace talked back as he smirked at Magnus.

"Oh Blondie, I am quite proud of my skills. Would you like a demonstration? I can send you in the hypes of heaven!" Jace, who was drinking his juice, choked up and spurted his juice towards Simon and Clary. Magnus and Alec stifled their laugh as Clary was fuming with anger on Jace.

"Jonathan Christopher Herondale!"

"Fuck! I'm really sorry! I didn't mean it! It's all this sparkle's-"

"I don't care! You will fucking pay for this you jerk!" Clary and Simon stood as they began running to chase Jace. The other three who were on the table finally burst out laughing. Even though Jace was such a jerk and an arrogant bastard, he was scared shitless of Clary. Their laugh was suddenly interrupted when they heard a smooth, lovely voice calling Alec.

"Alec?" Alec and the others turned to look at the source of the voice. Alec and Aline both widened their eyes of shock. Alec because he didn't expect he would be able to see her soon, and Aline because she was able to stare at Alec's companion. But her shock quickly faded and turned into a mocking smirk as realization dawned in.

"Well hello there hottie, mind introducing me to your companions?" Aline said as she went behind Alec's seat and hugged him from behind. Alec suddenly got uncomfortable at her intimate action, earning a raised eyebrow and questionable look from Magnus and Izzy.

"Ahm, guys this is Aline. She's my classmate in my class. Aline, this is Izzy my sister, and Magnus, my friend." Aline offered her hand to Izzy and Izzy took it. After a few seconds they released their hand and Aline grinned as she faced Magnus.

"Nice to_ finally _meet you, the ever great Magnus Bane."

"Well, it's also my pleasure to meet Alec's… friend." Magnus replied as they shook their hands. A few seconds later Aline released her hand from Magnus and hugged Alec back as she whispered on his ear.

"As I thought, you're _like_ me Alec. I got to say your green eyed beauty is _hot_." Alec blushed heavily and widened his eyes at what Aline whisphered. She just can't-

"No! It's not that! I'm not-" Alec desperately whisphered back while the other two were looking at them intently. Wondering what they were talking about.

"Oh really? We'll see then-" Aline suddenly released her hug and stood up behind Alec as her gaze fixed on Magnus.

"Magnus, I have _something _to tell you, do you know that Alec is-"Alec suddenly stood up and covered her mouth before she could reveal his secret. He was blushing furiously as he covered her mouth. Izzy immediately pieced it together as she looked at Aline in disbelief.

"Alec is what?" Magnus blurted out as his curiosity was killing him.

"Nothing Magnus! Really, don't mind her." Alec said as he tried to give him a reassuring smile but Magnus was having none of that. He knew the boy very well to know if he was lying, plus Alexander had always been _a horrible_ liar.

"Alexander, don't you dare lie to me because you know very well I can figure it out. Now, release the girl and let her speak." Magnus said as he narrowed his eyes on Alec, daring him to talk back. Alec shivered at the intense of Magnus' gaze as well as his authoritative tone, especially when he's calling him by his _full _name. He really didn't know but it was like a magic when Magnus called him by his full name that it made him weak. It made him weak to the point of _giving in_ to his wants.

And so without too much fight, he released his grip on Aline. He was really nervous when he released her. He honestly wished to disappear right at this very moment. There was no doubt Aline will reveal his long time secret. And Magnus will be angry of him for hiding it, of being a closeted gay. As what he had said before. This was it. The _end_ of their friendship. Alec closed his eyes as he dreaded to hear the words that will be uttered by Aline.

But _nothing_ came. After a minute he tempted to open his eyes and met Magnus' deathly glare.

"Aline. Spit it out or I swear I'll-"

"Alec is _my_ **crush**!" They all widened their eyes in shock and stared at her like she already lost her mind.

'_Well, at least she didn't reveal your secret Alec.'_ Alec mentally sighed in relief but then he knew he would be facing another awkward situation. The three of them were filled with eerie silence because of awkwardness when Magnus suddenly broke the silence.

"Well, well. I wouldn't be _surprised_ if someone got a crush on Alec." Magnus wiggled his eyebrow as he smirked at them.

"Wh-Why?" Alec managed to ask as confusion suddenly filled him.

"Why, you asked Alec. It's because you are such a beauty. And you're gorgeous, especially your blue eyes. You know I am a _sucker_ of your beauty. If you were gay I would _hook_ up with you." Magnus said as he winked at him once again causing the latter to blush.

"I-"Just then, the bell suddenly rang signaling the afternoon session of their class. Alec and Aline was grateful that their afternoon session was with Mr. Starkweather. The only teacher known for not attending his class during the first week. So that means he was absent for the entire week and they didn't have classes on the afternoon.

"Uh, I think we should go into your respective class now." Alec said as he looked at Izzy and Magnus, whom he knew that they had classes this afternoon.

"Who cares about the bloody boring classes? I'm sure we will just be bored to death there so it's better to skip it. How about you?"

"Uh, Mr. Starkweather is absent the whole week so-"

"Great. Come with me."

"Huh? Where are we?-"Alec was cut off when Magnus suddenly grabbed his hand and they walked fast through the hallway. Alec didn't have a choice but to let Magnus dragged him to somewhere as he didn't want to create a scene here. He turned his head and stared at Izzy and Aline who was grinning at them.

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><p>Alec and Magnus walked through the vast garden that was surrounded with beautiful flowers and colorful butterflies. This garden was their secret place since they were in their childhood. Magnus' mom had a private garden a few meters from their house and didn't let anyone know of the garden except her son, and apparently, Alec who had discovered the garden when they were searching for Magnus' whereabouts. Alec could still remember what happened that day. Magnus was 15 while he was 12 when Magnus decided to came out to his family. Magnus' family had already been downrock, and it only made worse that day.<p>

His dad cursed him and disowned him, even calling him a _demon_. And he was beaten up pretty badly. His father got imprisoned but ever since then Magnus got depressed. Their whole group supported Magnus and comforted him. They even slept in Magnus' house just to help him.

But that day he got missing and the whole group went searching for him. It was still early but it was raining heavily that got them all worried. And he found Magnus who was sitting on the grass on the corner, his legs were covered with mud as the rain soaked him. His head was on his knees as he heard his silent sobs.

When Alec came and approached him Magnus immediately flew himself on Alec. Clutching and holding unto him as if his whole_ life_ depended on it. Magnus started releasing all his silent pleas, while Alec was caressing his back, whispering soothing words to him. And ever since then they developed their friendship despite of their age gap.

And that incident was one of the major reasons Alec _didn't _want to come out. He was afraid he will be shattered and left broken.

Alec's thoughts was suddenly interrupted when he heard a snap. He glanced up and saw Magnus who was holding a blue rose on his hand. He putted the blue flower on Alec's ear causing him to blush at his actions. Magnus then suddenly positioned himself and rested his head on Alec's lap. Alec immediately ran his fingers through his smooth, silky hair.

"Blue looks really good on you, Alexander." Alec didn't said anything and just smiled in reply.

"Aline is having a crush on you huh. What will you do with it?" Magnus asked as he chuckled at the blush resurfacing on Alec's face.

"Hey! This isn't about me, it's about _you_!" Magnus' eyebrows frowned with confusion as he gazed at Alec from up above.

"Me? What about me?"

"Are you okay?" Alec said as he looked at him with comforting eyes as he stared at the golden-green eyed man beneath him.

Magnus released a breath he didn't knew he was holding and finally confessed to him.

"It hurt, Alec. Our moment together, I was really happy. But then he disowned me, like what he did. Actually I was not hurt that he was a closeted one. I was hurt because he cursed and disowned me because of my sexuality. At that time I didn't hear any of his useless craps. I was just remembering _that _horrible scene with my father."

"I know it hurts. I am sorry for that. But I want you to know you are not an abomination, or a cursed one. You're one of the _most beautiful man_ on earth I had ever knew. You're _not_ a player, you're just having a hard time in trusting someone, and you're finding the _right _one for you. _Who will_ love and accept you of who you are. "Magnus smiled at him as he raised his hand and ruffled Alec's hair. The younger man scoffed in annoyance. Magnus chuckled as he knew very well that his best friend didn't want it.

"Thank you for everything Alec. Of all people, you are the _only_ one who understands me very well. You _never_ judged me for my actions. Instead you understand and support me for whatever I do. No doubt Robert and Maryse entrusted you with your siblings. You're a responsible one and a good brother. And no doubt you will be a _good_ father in the future."

'_I will never have a family because I'm gay'_ Alec replied on his thoughts as he shrugged on Magnus. Alec raised his head as Magnus tilted his as they stared at the vast garden in front of them. They just enjoyed each other's company, enjoyed the feeling of the wind's soft breeze prickling their skins as silence filled between them.

"Magnus. If, if that didn't happened, if you know first that Woosley was closeted, what will you do about it?" Alec finally managed to ask as the thought was disturbing him.

"Maybe, maybe I will _help_ him came out to his parents."

"Will, will you do that? Will you really support him?"

"Of course. Alec, you really need to be honest in yourself if you wanted to be free. Lying, pretending will never do you good. Hiding didn't do you good either. It will just haunt you for the rest of your life."

"But, but what if, the world will disowned you? Like what happened to you before. You were so devastated that time Magnus. I think, I think that was one of the reasons why closeted gays, like Woosley didn't want to come out. It's _scary_ Magnus."

"I know, believe me I was also scared shitless when I decided to come out. The aftermath was hell. But somehow I can't help but feel it was worth it. At least I can be with myself and not pretend to only like women. And also, I realized who my true friends are, who loved, cared and accept me for who I am. I don't need to be surrounded with pretentious people who only stuck with you for fame, fortune or whatever wicked intentions they have."

Alec's eyes widened as the realization dawned on him. Magnus was right. The thought of coming out may be scary, but it will also allow you to know who really loves you. If he came out now, he would be positive that his true friends will never abandon him. But when Magnus came out, he was holding nothing. He didn't even know if Jace, Clary, Izzy, Simon and him will accept him. But Magnus took the courage to _take_ the step.

_'Magnus was really brave. It made me love him even more.'_ Alec said in his thoughts as it washed over him.

_'And if you really love him, fight for him. Take the chance to be with him. Don't let him suffer all alone like what that Woosley man did. Don't hurt him. He'd suffered enough already. Make him happy, that's what you want right?' _as the little voice in Alec's head said.

_'I will. I am considering it. But, but what if he will reject me?'_

_ 'He won't. At least not yet. You don't have to do it all together. Take the first step. Came out. At least you can be free of yourself. If everything will be all right then, get the courage to take the next step. Confess to him and be with him.' _

"And I will help Woosley, I will be there for him every step in the way. I know how frustrating it could be when you think no one will be there to support for you. I will tell him that I am here, to support him. That's the only thing I can do, isn't it?" Magnus replied when Alec didn't say anything.

"Yes." Alec replied, but more to himself because he wasn't listening to Magnus anymore. He released a heavy sigh as determination washed through him. He bowed his head to stare at Magnus' golden-green eyes as he finally came to a decision.

_'I will come out for you Magnus.'_

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><p>The gentle breeze of the wind and the earthly scent of the flowers in the garden surrounded Alec as he sat on the table with Magnus sleeping on the couch. After their little discussion on the corner they proceeded on the garden house to have a little rest, especially that Magnus was sleepy. And so Alec had decided to write another entry for the day as he will be having a change of fate on of these days.<p>

**Dear Diary,**

I had finally decided to do the thing I am most definitely afraid to do. And I know you wouldn't ask anymore who made me changed my mind. The answer will always be Magnus. It's really funny how I was so stubborn on the thought of coming out but just one advice from him and I am doomed. I guess that's how mysterious love is. But really, the main reason I wanted to come out is because I don't want him to hate me. More than he already will. The way he was disgusted and disappointed with Woosley a while ago, I don't want that to happen to me. I think I couldn't survive if Magnus were to look me in the eyes like that. I don't want him to be disappointed in me. And so, I am going to do it.

I just hope I can make it, this time for sure. I just hope. I just hope. Please guide me.

**Alec.**

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><p>AN:

My heart was breaking when I wrote this chapter, because their friendship is just too sweet but I know I have to break it, eventually. I felt like an ass now. Sigh.  
>So Alec finally decided to come out huh, What are your thoughts about it? Anyway here's a <strong>little snippet for the next chapter. Enjoy!<strong>

_"Magnus, I am afraid Alec can't come with you." Aline said as she grabbed Alec's hand and entwined their fingers together. Magnus caught glance of their hands in a second then raised his eyebrows at Aline._  
><em>"And why is that?"<em>  
><em>"Well, we need a quality time together. So I am afraid I will steal him away from you this time."<em>  
><em>"I am sorry Magnus. Plus me and Alec had something important to do." Izzy said as she gave Magnus an apologetic look. Alec was supposed to protest but he felt a death grip from Aline and so he shut his mouth once again. Magnus nodded as he finally gave in.<em>  
><em>"Alright. I understand. Good day, Alexander. I guess."<em>

**I can feel some tension in here!** What are Izzy and Aline planning? Hmm. Until then!

Lovelots,

Daime Guiral


	5. Chapter 3: The Bitches' Evil Plan

**A/N:**

Hey pals! So I want to apologize for not updating sooner. To make the long story short, I was **sick for about three weeks** that prevented me from writing and editing my chapters. I just recovered last Dec. 15th but then the workload and year end reports in the office was eating my time and energy. I finally finished my report and now I am back to editing and was able to made this chapter up!

One quick question though, how would you like my chapter? Would you like it lengthy chapter? or shorter ones? Because recently I was able to reach about 4-5k per chapter. You might get bored reading with it so I'm thinking of cutting it into parts.

**Advance Merry Christmas to everyone**! I hope you will enjoy this update lovelies!

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><p><strong>Chapter 3<strong>

**The Bitches' Evil Plan**

** Dear Diary,**

I am still quite sleepy right now because I was thinking of the choice I made yesterday. I was thinking of many ways on how to come out. How will _I say_ it to them? And when? Will it be on lunch? Or on dinner? Or with a gathering? And to _whom_ I will come out _first_? Will it be with my family? Or should I say it's better to come out with my friends first? And what should I say? _'Hey guys, I need to tell you something, I am gay.' _That's it. Will it suffice? Oh my angel my head is starting to hurt! I was busy repeating these questions to myself. At first I thought, if you have the will and determination to come out, then everything will be easy. But angel, it's **not.** I realized I had just taken the first step. There were still so many things to reconsider.

The worst part of it is that, I don't even know _where_ I should begin answering these questions. And most of all _how to answer_ these questions. I wanted to come out as soon as possible, for Magnus. But it may take a while than I have wanted to. Thankfully even though I overslept, I still managed not to be late at school. I am the first one to arrive right now and I am waiting for my classmates to come in. And speaking of classmate, I am half dreading to meet Aline again. Well, she knew my secret and she almost spill it to Magnus! But thankfully, she didn't, that I was grateful of. But I didn't realized she was . . . _like me_. Or at least that's what she told me. Sigh, I think I need to patch up this another mess aside from coming out, right? After all, she said to Magnus that she has a crush on me. Oh! Someone is coming right now and it was . . . Angel! It was **Aline**! I need to hide this before she would notice I am writing. I am sorry to end my entry here, we'll try to get back to you later. Bye!

**Alec.**

Alec suddenly closed his diary and hid it under the table just in time Aline came to his location.

"Good morning Alec! Did you have a wonderful day with your boyfriend yesterday?" Aline asked as she smirked and pulled out a chair to face Alec. There were just the two of them in the room so Aline decided to take the advantage of cornering him. Alec in return blushed on her statement.

"We didn't- we didn't do anything. And please, _he's not my boyfriend_ . . . he's just my friend. And, and you know that he . . . he _doesn't know_ about it." He lowered his head as he forced to utter the words on his mouth. Aline's eyes softened as he saw that Alec was really having a hard time on dealing with his sexuality. Or at least, he already accepted it. But coming out was entirely a _different_ story. She squeezed Alec's hand causing the latter to stare back at her.

"I know it's hard. Especially if the one you love the most doesn't have a clue on what you're feeling. But you know, you don't have to suffer this. If you would just come out, I have a feeling that he will love you back."

"I . . . I am _trying_ to. At least I finally decided to come out. But, it's not because I want him to love me, or return my feelings. I just wanted him to be proud of me, and won't be disappointed in me."

"It might be strange hearing this coming from a stranger like me, but believe me Alec, you are not and will _never_ be a disappointment. Especially to him. I can see how _selfless_ you are to him. Anyone would definitely love you. And believe me, he loves you."

_**'How I wish.'**_ Alec mentally replied as he flashed a smile in return with Aline's reply. But he chose not to comment on it because he knew, above _anyone else_ the true Magnus Bane. And he will _never_ be interested on him.

"By the way, ahm, yesterday, how did you know that I'm like you?" And just like that, the heavy aura between them had disappeared as Aline grinned on him.

"No offense Alec. But you **possessed this feminine figure** than a normal man. It's pretty clear that you are a sub, well I don't mean it in a BDSM language, but yeah I guess that's the closest thing I can describe you to. It's because of your shy demeanor as well as your figure my gaydar _kicked in_."

"Well, I admit I had a feminine figure than that of a normal man. And how did you knew that I was having a crush on Magnus?"

"It was really simple. When we had our activity yesterday and you showed it to the whole class, the chances of my guess had increased. Clearly I can see in the picture that the man you drew is _more_ than just your imagination. Mrs. Fray said we need to draw something that we value in life. Everyone might be amazed that you had interpreted something so thoughtful in life, like freedom, immortality and crap, but deary Alec, you _can't fool me_. Like me, you are a teenager too. I can see it through your mask. You were imagining someone when you drew it. Especially when you highlighted his eyes."

For the whole time Aline was explaining to him, Alec could only feel his blush had worsen. He didn't really expect that Aline would notice so much things about him, in such a very short period. He didn't even imagine his artwork would draw such deep thoughts and comment from it. The only thing that was on his mind that moment was to draw Magnus.

"And when I saw him on the lunch that was the time I confirmed everything and I smirked. I had hit the jackpot. But then I am so sorry that I put you in an awkward situation. I was just so excited to have a friend that swings on my way and was fangirling over a blossoming relationship that I forgot you are still closeted. So I am really sorry about it."

"It's okay. I know you didn't mean it. I mean, yeah I am sure we are quite in an awkward situation right now but I was just so glad that you didn't tell him my deepest secret."

"Of course I won't! Well, I admit I would love to tease you but it's not really my secret to tell. But if you ever need some help, count me in!" Aline offered her help with enthusiasm written all over her face. Alec thought intently on what he should do about the offer. Surely he could . . .

"Ahm, I- I wanted to ask for your help."

"Yes! And what help will you need?" Aline replied as her eyes was beginning to sparkle with excitement.

"Help me, **find the courage** to come out. I mean, what will I do? Do you have some advice on how to do it?"

"Of course I will surely help you! And I will make sure by the time you decided to confess it, it will be easier for you. So, for now, I suggest you relaxed your mind and don't over think about everything. We will talk more, _later_." Aline said just in time they heard few footsteps that were rushing towards their classroom. She grabbed her bag and walked through the table beside Alec and sat when the door was opened and their classmates came in. Mrs. Fray came in too and they continued their lecture from yesterday.

* * *

><p>Lunch came over after their first two periods and Alec and Aline were walking towards their usual place in the cafeteria. They were dismissed early by their teacher, Ms. Collins because they were able to finish their essay in their English class. When they arrived in their usual seat the cafeteria was still deserted when they suddenly heard a voice calling Alec's name.<p>

"Izzy, what are you doing here? It's not lunch time yet." Alec asked as he sat on the table with Aline beside him. Izzy rolled his eyes and replied with a witty statement to him.

"Look who's talking! I was the first one who volunteered to perform the dance presentation in our PE. The teacher was incredibly impressed with me that's why he dismissed me early. I gotta say what else you're expecting with an Isabelle Lightwood? **Only the best!"** Izzy proudly said and posed like an almighty queen with all the confidence she had that made Alec groaned.

"Yes, you're a queen already, stop flaunting about it."

"And you Mr. Lightwood, why the hell are you here, early? I see you've become a **rebel** then huh. _Trying to have a badass image Alexander_?"

"By the angel, I am not trying to have a badass image Izzy! Like you we were dismissed earlier so we got to go here earlier." Izzy raised her eyebrow in confusion in her brother's statement.

"We? Oh-"Just then Izzy finally noticed someone beside Alec and smirked.

"Oh, so you're hanging out with this lovely friend of yours huh, have you finally decided to _swing in both ways_ Alec, like Magnus did?" Alec immediately blushed when Izzy stated Magnus' name. One thing Alec noticed, however was that he _didn't flinched_ when Izzy said he decided to switch on _both_ ways. If he was the old Alec who was too stubborn to talk about homosexuality or third sex about him he would avoid the topic like a **plague**. He was too afraid someone would be suspicious of his sexuality. But now that he made up his decision, it seems that part of him had gone off. It was like he welcomed the thought with lightness on his heart.

But then he frowned as he remembered his actions before and realization dawned on him. Denying of who he was and avoiding it like a plague, now he realized _what_ Magnus was trying to say. Now that he thought about it he was . . . _disgusted_ with himself. _How could_ he do that? He treated it like some kind of deadly disease, but he himself was the deadly disease _itself_. He felt disgusted with himself as he tried to _deny_ his very own existence. Somehow he had found the courage to fight it and be comfortable with his own skin. Determination washed through him once again and it only encouraged him more to came out to the world. And so he lifted his head and looked his sister straight into her eyes.

"No, I didn't decide to swing in both ways, Izzy. _You know I only swing in one way_. And I mean _**not the straight way**_." Izzy gasped as her eyes widened in shock at Alec's statement. She literally froze on the spot as she covered her mouth with her hand while looking Alec in disbelief. Alec on the other hand had blushed furiously but he found himself smiling at what he said.

_'Yes, this is definitely a nice feeling. I felt like I had been released from my own cage and I can finally fly freely.'_ Alec thought as he sighed in deep relief. Relinquishing the nice feeling he felt this time.

**"Oh my GOD Alec! Did I hear it right? You just said 'not the straight way'? Am I dreaming? If I am then please don't wake me up! Oh my! Shit! Damn! This is true! You're- you're!"** Aline and Alec finally burst out laughing and giggling at Izzy's hilarious reaction. She must have been so shocked that Alec didn't know Izzy was capable of rambling and stuttering.

"Yes, Izzy. I mean it. And this time, I will finally _stand my ground_. But, please, _help me_." Izzy finally let out a breathtaking smile and hugged his brother tightly.

"Oh brother, I love you so much! Thank God you finally decided! Of course I will be with you always and I will support, accept and love you no matter what! You can count me in! And I'll kick their ass and bit the shit out of them if they bully or hurt you in any form!" Izzy said firmly as she wrapped her arms on her brother's arm and held him protectively. Alec in return smiled at the comfort his sister provided for him. He was now positive that he could do and overcome this, with the support of Aline and Izzy.

After a few minutes they finally released each other as Izzy sat on the chair opposite from Alec and Aline. Just then Alec's stomach growled loudly and the three of them burst out laughing.

"I think we need to order our food now. I am already starving. How about you girls? What do you want to order?"

"I'll just have cheese burger and a milkshake Alec!" Izzy answered to her as she was busy staring at her newly painted nails.

"Okay. How about you Aline?"

"Nah. I'm good. I brought a lunchbox with me. Maybe a drink will do." Alec nodded as he stood up and went to the counter to order their food. Leaving Aline and Izzy who were smirking at each other behind him.

"So let me get this straight, I know that _you're like_ my brother and you know that _he's crushing_ over Magnus. Are you up for **setting those two**?" Izzy asked her as she was wiggling her eyebrows in an amused manner that made Aline smirked in return.

"Oh, I'd love to! I am already committed into helping him coming out. And obviously I did a mistake yesterday and I am going to fix it. But do tell me, what are you planning on setting up those two? Since I already have a _fantastic idea_ on my mind."

"Oh. But on the second hand I don't think your mistake yesterday was bad. Granted, it will be a blessing in disguise. If you know what I mean."

"Hmm, I really like where this is going. Looks like we're on the same page!" Aline chuckled in reply and high-fived with Izzy as they shared a silent knowing looks with each other. Just then they heard many footsteps came dashing in the cafeteria followed by the sound of a bell signaling their lunch break. Izzy spotted the group coming towards their table with a questioning look as they stared at the Aline, the girl who had her back on them. Izzy smirked when she spotted Magnus and leaned closer to Aline to warn her.

"Are you ready to start our _evil nasty plan_? He's here." Aline's eyes widened but soon it turned into a grin as excitement filled her.

"Damn right."

"Hello Izzy. Who is this cute girl we have in here?" Simon said as he approached them on the table first and rest his shoulder on Aline. Izzy glared at Simon's hand that was resting on her shoulder that made Aline laughed. The others had seated on the table as they were staring at Aline.

"I am sorry bro, I ain't sw- interested in you." Aline flinched as she responded with Simon. She nearly admitted _her sexual preference_ with Magnus being there. Simon got embarrassed at her reply as he lift his hand on the air in surrender. The others had laughed on his hilarious rejection scene. Jace chuckled as he started to mock Simon.

"I told you Sheldon, **nobody** would ever be interested in you. You can _never win_ a girl's heart with your geek and nerdy nature! So deal with it!" Jace continued to tease her as Simon glared in return. Without warning he playfully punched Jace on his shoulder.

"Ouch! Man that hurts!"

"It's your fault you idiot! Don't be so full of yourself you bastard!" Jace scoffed and was about to talk back when Clary quickly covered his mouth resulting to Jace's rambling. She tried to divert their attention by asking Aline and making her comfortable in the group.

"So, may we know who you are? Are you Izzy's friend?"

"Uh no. I am Alec's classmate and friend." Aline smiled back as all of them, especially Jace looked at her in shock.

"Seriously? Alec made some friends on his first day in the class?"

"Yes! Well is that a bad thing? Alec was really kind and did nothing but good to me. He's such a sweetie! There's no doubt _everybody likes him_!" She said as she glanced on Magnus' direction when she said the last part.

"Wow. Well, my parabatai is really kind and gentleman but he avoided everyone like a plague especially during first day on classes. I am surprised he got to befriend you."

"Hmm, I gotta say I really thought Alec was mute because he was not talking to everybody and just liked to hide in the corner with his head bowed down. But you see, I am a stubborn girl and I forced him to talk with me. It only takes some motivation to be friend with him." Aline replied as she winked on Jace.

"I see you guys already know Aline." Everyone turned around and looked at Alec as he approached the table and sat beside Aline. Alec smiled shyly at his friends while a blush was staining on his cheeks at the attention he'd received from them. Just then Aline suddenly grab Alec and hugged him tightly causing the whole group, with exemption of Izzy, to gasps. Alec's blushed worsened as he look into Aline with confusion and shocked written all over his face.

"What are you doing?" Alec silently whispered to Aline as he was struggling to get out from her firm grasps.

"Alec, just _believe_ in me, will you?" Alec was supposed to ask what this was all about but when he took a look on Aline's face he felt his mouth shut. Aline was looking at him intently that found himself nodding in response. Aline smiled back as she faced the group once again.

"Alec went to the counter to order me and Izzy a food. He's such a sweetie, isn't he? That's why **I like him!**"

"So that's _why_ you rejected my offer! Because you liked Alec!" Simon stood up as he pointed his fingers on Aline who was smiling back at him.

"Correct! I really like Alec. He is such a rare gem that should be treasured on with his true worth. It's a pity though, not everyone could see his _true_ worth. But whatever, it's _their loss_, not mine." Aline said once again as she glanced on Magnus' direction before glancing on everybody once more.

"It's true. Alec is such a rare gem that should be taken care off. I am glad someone managed to see his worth. I could see you would make a good couple. I am glad that you liked him, and I can see that you're really sincere with your feelings on him." Magnus said as he smiled on the both of them. Alec just bowed his head at his comment. But the tension was broke when Jace scoffed once again in annoyance.

"Shut up Sparkles! Alec didn't _need_ to get your approval and opinion with his love life! If anything he ever need, that would be _my_ opinion, his parabatai and _no one else_!" Magnus smirked at him in return, clearly enjoying his annoyed expression.

"Well, Alec certainly didn't need your opinion, parabatai Jace. You just love to fuck around and _not_ having a serious relationship. Tell me, what could you possibly _give_ to Alec?"

"Look who's talking!"

"Well, I am 18 so I can clearly handle myself. While you, you are just a prodigal son who wants to _rebel_. So no, you're _out_ of the picture. I'll be the one to _guide_ Alec and Aline. Accept it, parabatai Jace." Magnus smirked as he continued mocking Jace.

"Oh you shut up cock sucker!"Magnus smirked even more as he wiggled his eyebrows.

"Well, I am quite _proud_ of my skill. Would you like a demonstration?"

"Urgh! Shut the fuck off! I don't want to talk about your sex life!"

"Hmm. Can't handle a simple teasing? You're such a _pussy_, Goldilocks."

"Oh. I love pussies and big round breasts-"

"Angel! **Stop it you two will you?** _Neither_ of you will be guiding Aline and me!" _'Because we don't have relationship to begin with and will never be.'_ Alec added in his thoughts.

"Whah! Chill bro! We will stop now, plus I'm really hungry so let's eat."Jace concede while Alec rolled his eyes but nodded nonetheless. All of them ate their meals and talked about their morning period.

* * *

><p>When the lunch break was over Jace, Clary and Simon rushed back to their respective classes leaving the four of them behind. Magnus turned and stared at his friend and then he asked.<p>

"Alec, you still didn't have class with Mr. Starkweather today right?"

"Uh. Yes. Why?"

"I would like you to come with me."

"What? Where? Why? What about your classes?"Alec frowned as he stared back at Magnus. He in return, chuckled. Amused by Alec's reaction.

"You really asked a lot of questions. Yes I have PE today and you know how I hate that class so I made an excuse. And I want you to go with me because I feel like it. And I think you already know where we're going."Alec nodded as he understood what Magnus meant. He was about to say yes when Aline suddenly interrupted them.

"Magnus, I am afraid Alec _can't come_ with you."Aline said as she grabbed Alec's hand and entwined their fingers together. Magnus glanced of their hands in a second then raised his eyebrows at Aline.

"And why is that?"

"Well, we need a _quality time together_. So I am afraid I will _steal him away_ from you this time."

"I am sorry Magnus. Plus me and Alec had something important to do."Izzy said as she gave Magnus an apologetic look. Alec was supposed to protest but he felt a death grip from Aline and so he shut his mouth once again. Magnus nodded as he finally gave in.

"Alright. I understand. Good day, Alexander. I guess."

"Uhm. Yeah. Good day, Magnus."Alec said as Magnus nodded and turned around. Little did the two boys know, the two bitches were smirking in triumph with their evil plan.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:**

Oh! I wonder where they are taking Alec? Well, this **snippet** might help us figure it out! Tell me what are your guess on where are they taking Alec. And who knows? The one who can guess it right might have an advance access to the next chapter? Good luck!

_"Izzy! Where are you taking me?" Alec cautiously said as anxiety reigned over him. He was walking with Izzy and Aline on each of his side as they took his hand and guided him to their unknown location. Alec could only guessed they are on a public place. The place was noisy and he could hear the crowd going back and forth on their way._

_ "Are you ready, Alec?" Alec gulped as nervousness started to creep in his body. His body was screaming to him that this was a bad idea. . But he also knew that Izzy was the only one who truly understood him and was there to support him all the way. So despite of his doubts he decided to trust her and he found himself nodding._

_ "Okay. That's good. We'll be releasing the blindfold in 3 . . . 2 . . . 1." Alec felt the blindfold around his eyes loosened up until it was gone. When he tried to open his eyes he was met with scorching light that made his eyes closed again from the pain of the light. He counted until 10 seconds before he slowly tried opening his eyes once again. _

_ This time the light was bearable and he could see faint lines and colors around the place. His eyes were still unfocused as he slowly took in the blurred surrounding. After a few more seconds the blurry surrounding faded until it became crystal clear. And that's when Alec's face blushed furiously as he realized where they were._

_ Oh My God._

**How was it? Did you like it? I would also like to say a Merry Christmas to all and I hope you will be enjoying your Christmas break! I'll try to update Inside the Devil's Den this 21th, hopefully, after I finished editing the whole chapter. **

**Until Then!**

** Lovelots,**

** Daime Guiral.**


	6. Chapter 4: Be Comfortable in your Own Sk

**A/N:**

Happy New Year everyone! First update of the year! Yay! How was your Christmas vacation? : )

Just want to let you know this is a MEH chapter. I really don't know what to write in this chapter but I hope you'll like it! Anyway, just enjoy the joyful and fluffy moments while you can because sooner we'll head on to the drama, painful and agonizing part of the story and I tell you, **the moment it started there's no stopping it until the end! **I will tell you when it will start, maybe in 5 chapters or so.** For now, Remember that bolded phrase! :) **

So much for now, I hope you'll enjoy the update!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 4<strong>

**Be Comfortable in your Own Skin**

Alec groaned as he stepped inside the cab together with Aline and Izzy who were grinning like crazy. He was slightly disappointed that he didn't get a chance to be with Magnus again. God knows how much he treasured every time being with him. Even if Magnus didn't feel the same way. He turned around and eyed Izzy suspiciously.

"Izzy. What are you up to?" Just then the grin on Izzy's face suddenly disappeared as she smiled at him innocently.

"What brother?"

"Izzy, I know something's _fishy_ is going on. I know you! Why did you say that thing to Magnus? And you also, Aline." Izzy just rolled her eyes in annoyance as she scoffed on her brother.

"You're overthinking and overreacting things, Alec. Did you forget that you recently wanted to come out and that you asked for our _help_? Well, we have no time to waste around. As much as I hate interrupting your precious time with Magnus, we have to. You need to learn more things about going out as gay and living with it from this time on. So, your top priority as of the moment is to be comfortable in your own skin and get the courage to come out."Just then Alec's eyes softened and he sighed in defeat as he finally got what Izzy was saying.

Izzy was right. If he wanted to come out to the world he must be comfortable in his own skin first. He must be comfortable with people's eyes on him as well as be familiar how this whole gay life works. He was living in the closet all of his life and when he finally came out, his life would change. Not only had he needed the strength and courage to come out. But he needed to _live_ it as well.

"But don't worry, once you're out of this world, you could have all the time with Magnus. You can catch up everything with him. And who knows you will be a very cute couple then, too." Alec's face flushed as the two girls '_awed'_ and laughed on his adorable face.

"Quit teasing me guys will you!"

"Haha. Okay, okay. We're sorry Alec. But really, don't worry about Magnus right now. I am pretty sure he can handle himself. For now, let us help you with your situation." Aline reassured as she reached and squeezed her hand against him.

"Okay. I trust you guys, and thank you for helping me. But, where are we going?"

And just like that, Izzy and Aline's sinister smile and evil grin appeared once again as they replied.

"It's a secret." And they blindfolded Alec.

* * *

><p>"Izzy! Where are you taking me?" Alec cautiously said as anxiety reigned over him. He was walking with Izzy and Aline on each of his side as they took his hand and guided him to their unknown location. Alec could only guessed they were on a public place. The place was noisy and he could hear the busy crowd going back and forth on their way. Izzy and Aline pulled his arm as they swerved their direction. Just then the noises was slowly fading and he found himself entering in a much smaller place than before. He was guessing it was a stall.<p>

They took few more steps until they came to a stop and that's when Alec felt Izzy and Aline turn sideways to face him.

"Are you ready, Alec?" Alec gulped as nervousness started to creep in his body. His body was screaming to him that this was a _bad_ idea. He knew that Izzy had these crazy ideas and weird fantasies that she wanted to do with him, especially if it has something to do with his sexuality. But he also knew that Izzy was the only one who truly understood him and support him all the way. So despite of his doubts he decided to trust him and he found himself nodding.

"Okay. That's good. We'll be releasing the blindfold in 3 . . . 2 . . . 1." Alec felt the blindfold around his eyes loosened up until it was gone. When he tried to open his eyes he was met with scorching light that made his eyes closed again from the pain of the light. He counted until 10 seconds before he slowly tried opening his eyes once again.

This time the light was bearable and he could see faint lines and colors around the place. His eyes were still unfocused as he slowly took in the blurred surrounding. After a few more seconds the blurry surrounding faded until it became crystal clear. And that's when Alec's face blushed furiously as he realized where they were.

_Oh My God._

They were in a ladies clothing stall. Everything around him was just _feminine_. Ranging from the ladies pants, shirt, shoes, and accessories. From the corner he could see a sales lady approaching them wearing a gentle smile on her face.

"How can I help you Maam? Sir?" The lady said as she came to their location. Alec attempted to speak and tell her that this was all a mistake, when he groaned in pain as he felt Aline harshly pinched the skin on his hip.

"Ah, yes. We're here to help my brother find some suitable clothes for him. That will make him look like a girl. You see, we were trying to enter a contest where he needs to cross-dress. So we're hoping you have the finest and the best clothing available in here." Just then the girl tilted her head and raked his body up and down. That gesture made Alec shivered uncomfortably. He always felt awkward and uncomfortable whenever the girls did that to him.

"Well, he had a very nice feminine body. Plus he's lean, he had a very smooth silky skin so I think we wouldn't have a problem in trying clothes to him. Considering his height, I bet he will gain advantage over his competitors." The lady said as she kept nodding while staring profoundly at him. Alec gulped as he ducked his head not to meet the lady's stare. He always knew that stare. Izzy always did that to him. It's the stare where Izzy was mentally taking off his clothes and dressing him up for her greedy fantasies.

The thought of a stranger doing that to him was just very awkward. And the fact that not only he was in a ladies shop didn't help to lessen his blush at all.

"Well then, that's great! Show to us your bestselling dresses then!"

"Right away Maam. Just give us a few minutes to gather the best dresses for you." When the lady disappeared Alec finally had the courage to turn around and confront the two girls who were smirking like crazy.

"This is _insane_! Why did you take me into a ladies shop! I am _not_ a girl!" Alec whined as realization took in of how all of this was a _huge mistake_. He should've followed his instinct first hand.

"Ah, no offense, Alec. But you have the perfect feminine body. And that's why we agreed this will be your first step in coming out and being comfortable with being gay."Aline shrugged as she replied that made Alec stared at her in disbelief.

"How is this a part of being comfortable as gay? I am not comfortable with wearing dresses! Let alone some girl dresses! I am doing great with my sweaters, thank you. I don't need this!" Alec replied in distress that just made Izzy rolled her eyes.

"Oh hush brother! Your awful shaggy and holey sweaters will do you no good! You will not be attracting men's attention with that! Alec, when you announce to the world that you are gay, the gays will start giving you their interest and attention as well. So you need to start dressing up to catch their attention!"

"I am not trying to get their attention. I just need to come out to our family and friends! I never intended to flaunt my sexuality in public Izzy! And I do not wear- - _la- ladies_ clothes! It's just awkward and uncomfortable!"Aline just sighed in defeat and shook her head with Alec's stubbornness.

"Alec, we know you're not a typical or a stereotype gay where you're into wearing ladies stuff. But that's not the only reason why we're doing this." This time they finally got Alec's attention and genuine curiosity as he raised his eyebrow and stared at her.

"And what other reason may it be?"

"In a gay relationship, you're aware of the term top and bottom right?" Alec's blush appeared once again as he choked in reply.

"Ye- yes."

"And what role do you think you are?"

"By the angel!" Alec groaned as he finally covered his face with his hand in embarrassment. Izzy and Aline's smirk came back as they knew they had cornered him.

"Well?" Izzy supplied as she was enjoying cornering her brother like this.

"I- I don't know!"

"Bottom." Aline took the liberty of answering Izzy's question while Alec was blushing like a virgin on his wedding night.

"Exactly. With your feminine figure and gentle demeanor, there is no doubt you are a bottom. And being as a bottom, you are entitled in fulfilling some . . . sexy fantasies your top has."

"I am not discussing this with you! Why are you jumping up with those sexual fantasies already?"

"Hey come on! Don't be like that! We are just thinking hypothetically! When you will come out as a gay you will be attack with their sexual innuendos and shit so you must be at least prepared for that. And if you can, fight off or at least try to minimize your blush. They will instantly know you are a virgin if you're not comfortable with all of that. You will look like a blushing virgin on her wedding night."

"Izzy!" Alec shrieked in embarrassment but Izzy just continued speaking as if Alec didn't scold her.

"And part of those sexy fantasies your top will have is to have their lover dressed up as a girl. It's such a turn on to them Alec. And I bet Magnus has it too. The moment he will see you wearing a ladies' garments, believe me, he wouldn't be able to take his eyes on you." Izzy finally dropped the bomb as they smirked at Alec's reaction.

"No way! There is no way I am doing this! I will die from absolute embarrassment! No matter what!" Alec shrieked in distress as he tried to literally run away from the shop but not so fast as they both grabbed his arm and paralyzed his movements by sandwiching him between their bodies.

"I am sorry brother, but you need to do this! Believe me, you will love it!"

"And Alec, if you don't do this, I will tell your secret to Magnus. You wouldn't like that, would you?" Aline whispered in his ear that made Alec gulped in fear. He tilted is head to stare back at Aline's innocent look and sinister smile. And that's when Alec knew he was doomed.

"You're all crazy!" Alec just said in defeat as the two of them clapped their hands in victory.

* * *

><p>For about two hours Alec was exhausted as the two girls literally just made him their official Barbie doll. He's been changing clothes from those horrible khaki, skinny jeans and pants Izzy picked for him as well as Aline's too revealing skirts and tubes. They even made him wear some stiletto heels, bracelets and accessories. Good thing though that they didn't attempt to put make up on his face. He didn't know if he could survive it.<p>

As much as he hated himself for dressing these stuff, he couldn't help but admire their sense of fashion. The outfit they picked really made him stood out like a girl. If you didn't know him, you would've suspect he was really a girl. Alec just stared at himself on the mirror of the dressing room as he took in his exhausted face.

"And for the main attraction for the day!" Suddenly the door was slammed open that made Alec begged for them to stop.

"By the angel! Please stop! I can't take this anymore! I am too tired!"

"Oh no brother! This is the last thing! I promised! This will really looked good on you!" Just then Izzy waved the outfit to him that made him widened his eyes as he stared at the outfit in horror.

"No! No! Please! Just not that outfit!" The outfit was a black maid French costume with ruffled pinafore apron with a Parisian design and polka dots. The apron was attached to a black knit dress with sheer sleeves and large back bow. Its lower part was a skirt that was too short and revealing to his liking. It also has a black crossed fishnet pair of stockings that is paired with the silver stiletto heels Aline chose for him earlier.

"Brother, we promised this is the last one! Please?" Izzy and Aline looked at him with puffy eyes that made him hard to resist it.

"This will be the last one or I swear I will end this nonsense!" Alec raised his voice in warning.

"Yes! Thank you!" Then they shoved the outfit to Alec and he sighed in defeat as he tried to wear the very complicated and difficult outfit.

It took him 30 minutes to figure out how to wear the bloody outfit. By the time he was done he was having big sweats on his forehead. He was finally done wearing the fishnet stockings and was about to wear the fucking 5 inches heels when a very familiar voice echoed around the dressing room and it get louder and louder as the owner of the voice was coming closer to them.

"Izzy! Aline! What a surprise! Why are you here? I thought you have some business with Alec today?" Alec froze in horror as his body stiffened and went rigid when he recognized the owner of the voice as Magnus.

"Ah yes! We're taking care of it! How lovely to see you here Magnus. What are you doing here?"

"I was buying some perfumes, make up kit and glitter since my supply is running out." Just then Magnus stared at the bunch of clothes Izzy and Aline was holding.

"Oh! So you're having shopping and waiting for your turn in the dressing room! Poor Alec, he must be tired right now waiting for you two. We all know how much he hated shopping." Alec picked out his clothes from the floor before Magnus could see them and raised some suspicious to them. He went to the farthest corner of the tiny dressing room as he tried himself to be quiet and evened his breathing. There was no way he would let Magnus caught him in such an embarrassing outfit.

But suddenly Izzy stepped inside and immediately grabbed his arm and yanked him out just in time Magnus could finish his next question.

"Where is Ale-"Magnus' eyes widened as he raked up and down Alec's body. A deadly silence filled the four of them. No one dared to speak. Alec was blushing furiously as he lowered his head, trying not to meet Magnus' questioning gaze. Magnus' eyes narrowed as his cat-eyed golden green eyes nearly disappeared and replaced with pitch black color.

"Alexander. . . "Before Magnus could say anything else, he yanked down Izzy's hand harshly and went back towards the dressing room. He locked the door securely as he kneeled on the opposite corner and brought his knees up to his chest while covering up his ears. He was having mixed feelings right now that he just wanted for the ground to open up and devoured him. He felt mostly afraid, of how Magnus would react on him wearing a woman's outfit. Would he be _disgusted_ on him? He also felt _humiliated_ that someone else had to see him like this. He just knew he couldn't look at Magnus in the same way again. And last but not the least, he was pissed on Izzy and Aline as he agreed with their crap.

"What happened? Why was Alexander wearing . . . a woman's outfit? I thought you have some important business to do?" Alec heard Magnus asked from the outside and he groaned in humiliation as he buried his face on his knees.

"Well, this is our business Magnus. Alec lose a bet with us and that's why we dared him to do it even if he dreaded for it." He heard Izzy replied to him.

"Wow. He actually let you have your way on him? How did you that? We all know he hated anyone who plans to dress him up. Let alone those sexy woman outfits."

"Well, let's just say that we have a very powerful alas against him."Aline replied on Magnus that made him narrowed his eyes on her.

"And what would that be?"

"Na-ah! It's not my story to tell, it's Alec." Aline replied as she smirked on Magnus that made him slightly irritated. He hated it when he didn't know what was going on around him, especially with his dear friends. Alec hissed in annoyance as he knew that Aline was playing a dangerous game and was provoking Magnus. He now realized what the evil smirks and grins her two friend bitches meant. They were trying to get Magnus jealous. As if Magnus would _ever_ be jealous. In Magnus' eyes he was just a friend and always will be.

"You know how I hated it when you guys are keeping a secret to me. Now tell me or else-"

"Magnus?" Their conversation was interrupted by a man's angelic voice that was unfamiliar in Alec's ears. The surrounding went quiet until Alec heard footsteps of a man turning around that he assumed was Magnus.

"Imasu." Magnus said as he recognized the man who called him. Imasu gave a breathtaking smile as Magnus recognized him.

"Who is this handsome guy, Magnus?" Izzy asked as Imasu started walking behind Magnus' back.

"This is my new classmate, Imasu Morales. He came from Peru. He just got transferred here the last summer. He's senior and my classmate."

"I see. Well hello there, I am Izzy. Nice to meet you Imasu!" Izzy said as he extended her hand and Imasu gently took hold of it and kissed it lightly with his lips.

"Nice to meet you too, my Lady Izzy."

"Hello Imasu. I am Aline." Aline said and Imasu released Izzy's hand and attempted to get Aline's hand when she slapped it away causing everyone to gasp in shock.

"Err, I'm sorry but I am not that found of touching . . . strangers."

"Oh. I apologized My Lady."Imasu said as he vowed in front of Aline. After a few second he straightened up and turned and leaned on Magnus' ear.

"I can see you're not busy right now. I do hope you're going to accept my offer this time. Yesterday you turned down my offer you know."Imasu whispered in his ear that made Magnus rolled his eyes of just how loud his voice was. He suddenly gasps when he felt a pinched on his back. And he knew what Imasu exactly meant. He hadn't got laid for the past week ever since he returned from his vacation. And here he was, a handsome boy inviting to have sex with him. Who was he to deny such a blessing?

"Alright. Izzy, Aline, we'll talk later. Please tell Alec I will call him later. Good bye."

"Goodbye." The two girls just shrugged in annoyance but Magnus wasn't able to notice it as he quickly turned around and carried his things to the counter and pay his bills. Imasu let out a laugh at Magnus' eagerness. After a few minutes they left together the shop.

The whole time Alec was just staring at the floor, trying to comprehend what just happened. He knew it would happen. It always ended up this way. He was used to it. But what he couldn't understand was that, even though he already long accepted the fact that he and Magnus was just friends, he always felt like there's a _hole_ that was digging on his heart. That _hollow feeling_ he had everytime this happened appeared once again. He felt, _empty_.

"Alec, are you alright?" Just then he heard the silent and sympathetic whisper of his sister from the other side of the dressing room. Alec released a deep breath as he tried to gather his thoughts. When he was calmed down he started removing the piece of the damn clothing they made him wear and began to wear his precious sweaters. After a few minutes he stood up and slammed the door open that made Izzy and Aline startled on his action.

"Look at what you guys did! I knew this was such a horrible idea! Now I can't look at Magnus' face anymore!" Alec screeched and whined as his cheeks were tainted with blush from the embarrassment he received earlier.

"Geez. Relax Alec. Everything is fine. Well, before that Imasu came everything was fine. I can assure you that. You didn't need to feel embarrassed with him. I am sure Magnus loved your outfit. Did you see the way his eyes were devouring you earlier?" Izzy smirked as she went back on teasing Alec in an attempt to lighten the situation. She knew how Alec was hurt when Imasu came. But Alec didn't need that. He didn't need her self-pity to be thrown in front of his face, especially not in front of another audience. She knew they will discuss it later in private.

Meanwhile Alec rolled his eyes at her statement and just mumbled something under his breath.

"What did you say?"

"Nothing. Let's get out of here please. This isn't funny anymore." Alec said as he looked at them with plea on his eyes. Aline and Izzy sighed and finally gave in knowing they tortured Alec enough.

"Okay. We're done here. As of the other things you need to learn for you to be comfortable in your own skin, we can do those things at home."

"Thank God!" Alec sighed in relief as they walked out of the building.

* * *

><p>Just when Alec thought his nightmare was already over, he was wrong.<p>

When they arrived home Izzy said for him to hurry up changing his clothes and tidying up his things because they will be having a movie marathon together with Aline. When he was done changing his clothes he immediately went downstairs to find Izzy who was inserting the DVD on the player.

"Oh Alec! Great timing! The movie will start in a minute. Aline! Are you done there?"

"In a minute Izzy!"

"Alright! Alec, you sit in the middle of the couch."

"Okay." Alec replied and did as he was told. He sat on the middle of the couch while looking at the TV monitor. Not a minute later Aline came in the living room with a tray on her hand with juice and some snacks on the tray. She placed it on the table and joined Alec on the couch. After a few second Izzy joined them as well as she sat on Alec's other side. Alec noticed he was being sandwiched by the two girls beside him but he decided to ignore it.

The movie had started rolling and the three of them were in deep concentration as they watched it. Only then in the middle of the movie where the two male protagonist started kissing passionately that Alec's face flooded with blush. He tried to stand up but then both of his wrists were being trapped with Izzy and Aline on his both sides.

"Let me go! I don't need to see this!" Izzy chuckled as she saw her brother squirming uncomfortably on the couch.

"Watch and learn Alec. That is called French kissing. They used tongues and they're exploring the warm cavern of their partners through kissing. Someday whether you like it or not, you will be doing that same thing. You may be a virgin but it doesn't mean you'll remain innocent."

"Izzy's correct Alec. At least you should know these things so they wouldn't pick on you and fool you with their wicked intentions you know."

"But I am only 15! I don't need to know these things yet!"

"Oh please, I bet you're the only 15 year old gay who is still a virgin! Now shut up and just learn!" Aline scolded him as Alec winced once again for her deathly grip on his shoulder. He reluctantly raised his head and stared at the scene before him. The two males were still kissing like there's no tomorrow until one of them released the other one and started kissing the man's neck. He nibbled and sucked on the man's neck until it left a mark that made the other moaned in pleasure. Alec felt his surrounding started to get heated. Alec gulped as he was trying to stay calm despite of his problems. A few minutes more of watching the erotic scene in front of him until he felt himself slowly getting hard.

Alec panicked at his problems that he literally jumped out of the couch that made Aline and Izzy startled and gasped at him in shock. Alec ignored them and stormed out towards his bedroom. When his door clicked lock he ran on his bathroom and opened his shower, letting the cold water rinse to calm his body down.

"By the angel! This isn't happening! Calm down Alec!" He continued repeating on himself as he was panting and trying so hard to deal with his big problem. But no matter what he does he always ended up thinking the erotic scene at the TV. He was feeling so hot all over just watching those two males kissing and making out in the bedroom. He wondered how he would react if he was doing it with . . .

"Arrgh! Stop thinking about it! Think about the women breast, their slim figures and the way they flirt with you!" Alec forced himself to focus on picturing a woman wearing sexy clothes. Just as he was picturing on it his face scrunched up with disgusts and uneasiness. The next thing he knew he felt himself soften up. After a few minutes he found himself calming down and decided to take the shower to refresh his mind.

* * *

><p>When Alec was done showering, he was surprised to find the skyline already covered with pitch black darkness. He walked towards the bed and looked at his phone. His eyes widened when he saw the time was already 7 pm. He couldn't believe himself he showered for almost 2 hours just because of the incident. He groaned in annoyance once again. The thing he did with Izzy and Aline was a total crap and totally not working at all.<p>

At last he finally figured he should just do this on his own. And then he suddenly remembered what Magnus said to him one time when their group did a spin the bottle game.

"_If you have one trait you like in Alec, what would it be, and why?"_

"_That would be his straightforwardness and honesty."_

"_Why?"_

"_I admired that trait of Alec because he never had the problem to express what he thought about things. He just blatantly said it to you without thinking about it. If you need a friend who can give you an honest and unbiased opinion, Alec would certainly be the perfect friend to find. Alec was such a brave person for doing that. I salute his straightforwardness and bravery." _

"_I salute his straightforwardness and bravery." _

Just then, Alec realized what he must do to end this once and for all. He quickly changed his clothes and walked downstairs to find Izzy and Max sitting on their kitchen table while their mother was placing their food in the table. His father was getting the water from the fridge as they looked on him. He didn't know what time they arrived but he found himself not caring about it.

"Oh brother, good that you are finally here. I was going to knock on your bedroom and fetch you for dinner. Mom said not to bother you until the food was ready because you might be working on your homeworks but-"He didn't heard what Izzy was saying, and he didn't care at all as he was only focused about the one thing that was bugging in his mind.

"_You need to tell them the truth."_

And so, without warning at all, he decided to drop the bomb.

"**Listen everyone. I have a very important news to tell you. I am gay."**

* * *

><p><strong>AN:**

In the end, only Magnus gave him the courage to come out XD Did you like it? **What do you think will happen? Will they accept Alec's sexuality or not?** To help you decide, here's a snippet for Chapter 5.

_"Alec . . . what did you just say?" Alec gulped nervously as he took in his father's appearance. His eyes were wide and was looking at him in awe. He could feel his fingers trembling with fear and his knuckles turning white as he finally brought himself with this confrontation. His heart was beating so fast he was afraid it might jump out from his system._

Did you like it?

Until Then!

- **Daime Guiral**


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